Monday, August 27, 2012

It is time for me to show my true colors

Over the weekend, I attended an Abhishekagni Convention led by Fr. Xavier Khan Vattayil of Sehion Ministries. The convention was attended by over a 1,000 people. It was by far the largest Bible convention organized by the Catholic communities of Washington DC area. For those who are not familiar with Fr. Vattayil, he is a renowned preacher of the 'WORD OF GOD'. He is committed to spread the 'Good News' all over the world, and his sermons and services are providing tremendous change in lives of people around the globe. The television programs led by Fr. Vattayil lead many to faith through the work of Holy Spirit. 

I can attest to the fact that his television programs can change life, I have experienced several physical as well as spiritual healings just by watching him on Youtube. If anybody has any doubt about my sanity for making that statement, just know that I fully understand how that thought process work. I used to be that guy. There was a time when I passionately despised anything to do with spiritual retreats. I used to think that if God can solve everybody's problem when they scream a bunch of "Alleluia" and other praises, then why do anybody need to do anything, why do we need to study or work, why do we need doctors and hospitals. I knew for certain that all of that stuff was a hoax, just playing with people's emotions. I knew everyone of those people who lead these conventions were going straight to hell, if there is such a thing. I didn't know how they could get away with taking advantage of God's name like that. After all, God is not somebody you play with, and these people were treating Him as if He was a glorified genie asking for everything from relief from debt to curing cancer. 

For me, God was a grandmaster, a great force that was everywhere, influencing everything we do; somebody with a master plan, making his moves so that everything goes according to his plan. I didn't believe in prayers because I firmly believed that nothing can influence this mastermind and his plans. I am not sure how I came about with this theory, but I thought of it as a good theory. With it, I could explain everything that happens, unlike the atheists who has a lot of explaining to do.

Then one day, this grandmaster made his move on me. All I was doing was standing in front of a computer watching Fr. Vattayil praying for those who couldn't pray, for those who couldn't believe, for those who have shut God out of their hearts. That's when I felt the HEAT, it passed through my body from head to toe in an instant, and it left me in a pool of sweat. I suddenly felt like a big weight has lifted off of me. A lot has changed in my life since that day as I began to experience a God who listens, a God who is willing to move the mountains, a God who is willing to risk everything in search of the one who is lost. A love so great, it compelled me to testify at the Abhishekagni convention. Until then, my pride kept me from sharing the great blessings I have received. "Without cost you have received; without cost you are to give" (Matthew 10:8), I finally obeyed.

I believe that the greatest gift I have received is the ability to understand the problem of accepting and believing God, not just any God, but the God of Abraham and the prophets, the God who walked the earth only to die on a cross, the God who still lives among us and dwells in each one of us. I firmly believe that God cannot be force fed. It is a call, the good news is that all of us are called. "Do not fear," God says, " for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine" (Isaiah 43:1). 

I have also changed my thought process about praying, I firmly believe in prayer. I no longer have the idea of God as a chess player with a master plan, instead I believe in the Will of God. I believe that if God can find me standing in front of a laptop, suspiciously listening to a priest talking about the Word, then anyone of you can be found. If it is my call to be an instrument to deliver your call, then who am I to say no to it.

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