I am humble, am I not?

It is hard to feel humble in a world full of sinners and criminals, pedophiles and prostitutes. No matter how much I try, I see myself better than the wretched of the world.  I see myself feeling satisfied about being able to do penance for my transgressions, or feeling good about attending mass on a day of non-obligation,  or feeling generous when throwing a dollar at the homeless man on the street corner, or feeling special for fasting among a gluttonous crowd. I find it hard to sympathize with a terrorist who bombed a day care center or a serial killer with a freezer full of body parts. I haven't done any of it, I haven't even imagined about doing any of it, but somehow I need to convince myself that, in order to be humble, I am no better than them! 

Each one of the aforementioned people have failed in their lives, but so have I. Magnitude of our failures does not make any difference; big or small, we all need the grace of God to overcome the failures. The same God that delivers me from my sins is the one who looks mercifully at every other fallen beings, it is the same grace that saves all of His creation. It is humbling to know that, "You did not choose Me but I chose you, and appointed you that you would go and bear fruit, and that your fruit would remain,..." (John 15:16). Everything I boast about in my daily life, my parents, my wife and kids, my siblings and other family members, the skills I have, the people I know are all given to me. Yes, I studied hard, worked harder and hardly wasted anything in my possession, but there is something more to it than that. If look hard enough, I can see the presence of a skilled craftsman in my life, perhaps I am only an instrument in his hands. Maybe when people appreciate me, the appreciation is only due to the work of the craftsman. It is even possible that they are not appreciating me after all, they appreciating the creator and the product. 

I know that I am not humble, I can never be humble. I can never think of 'being humble' as a goal, it will be too arrogant to set the parameters to reach that goal. A humble person can look at the world and ask the question "What's wrong with the world?",  immediately bow his head with the conviction that the only answer to that question is " I am". I am only able to look at him and say , "Yup, he is right". I agree because I am too HUMBLE to argue!!